Dick Valentine once famously sang: "I don't know a lotta French, but I gotta shit load of Euros", and I'm sure he manages to entertain himself successfully on the continent. I however don't have a shit load of Euros, and my recent trip to the continent has left me with an empty wallet.

A lesson to all: don't think that a more efficient car makes a trip to the Nürburgring any cheaper, it doesn't. It just means you go around it more, even if your brakes became Pringle shaped after the first ten laps.

Also, if you want to be cheap, don't buy an estate car. The compulsion to see just how much booze, chocolate and cheese you can buy and fit in the boot in Calais is indeed irrepressible.

On the right there are a few links to some of the events we've tackled over the last year or so. Along with warmth, light, foreign criminals roaming the streets and unnecessary hose pipe bans, I hope the summer will bring at least a sprinkling of immaturity and adventures on four wheels. Just need to get the finances under control and give the M.A.D.® ideas box a shake...